Friday, June 29, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #19: Raja

Boston Atheists member Raja writes:

I was born in a Hindu family. I did not become an atheist overnight. It came gradually to me. Although, it should not be much of a struggle to reject an ancient system that is founded and still practiced primarily on the basis of caste and mythical gods and goddesses, it did not come easily to me while formally rejecting Hinduism. True that it should have come much earlier than it did because my father was an atheist in his own way. He and Bengali (yes I come from an area in India where we are called Bengalis because we speak Bengali!!) youths of his time (and now too) experimented with Marxism. So it wasn’t too difficult for him to not go to temples or do silly rituals because that’s what all his peers did! My mother, on the other hand, in spite of adhering to leftist values, used to be (not anymore) a devout Hindu. I followed my mother’s footsteps for a long time before realizing why she attempted to show excess devotion to a moribund Hindu system. Of course, it was caste! She came from a ‘lower caste,’ whereas my father was from ‘upper caste Brahmin!’ As one can imagine that though no pressure came from my father, and they lived away from their respected families (a big deal in a society that glorifies living together with extended families), still my mother wanted acceptance from my father’s ultra-orthodox ‘upper caste’ family members. She performed all the rituals with devotion, and I did those too; but of no avail. She still remained a lower caste, and my father’s family still kept her separate from all family ceremonies. I wasn’t aware of it until I was 13, because thirteen is an age when Brahmins (boys only) are supposed to have an initiation ceremony. The archaic rituals required the mothers to be involved in various ceremonial occasions; and my mother, being a ‘lower caste’ was to be barred from joining those rituals. My father did not take a strong stand against it, probably because he felt weaker against the Hindu oligarchy, and partly because my mother wanted the ceremony to happen! When I learned all of these, I not only refused the entire silly ceremony but also rejected caste-Hnduism altogether. The Hindu ‘limbo’ is guaranteed for me!

I left caste-Hinduism, but yet could not leave Hinduism completely. Although I learned that others believe in other gods etc., but that did not bother me because in Hinduism there are millions of gods and goddesses! What really struck me is when I observed an strange phenomena where a new goddess was added into the pantheon of Hindu gods and goddesses in the 20th century India. The goddess came not from any ancient text, but from celluloid, from a Bollywood (I think) devotional film. After the film I observed people making temples in that goddesses name, and millions began worshiping that ‘celluloid’ goddess with the same devotion as they did to other million gods and goddesses! Even my mother became involved in this new phenomenon! Fasting, rituals, devotional singing, a special day for the goddess; everything came with the film!! Even my child-mind could not comprehend this bizarre cultural trend. But it did one thing to me; I learned to reject all of those millions of gods and goddesses at once. Here I must confess that a counter-culture at that time also flourished where ridiculing Hindu gods and goddesses were done in books and films in regular basis. Bengal used to be one in the forefront of this counter-culture. I still remember a film during the same time of the devotional film came out where they made fun of the Hindu system using a very popular devotional story. Then I read Bertrand Russell’s ‘Why I am not a Christian,” and I read Bhagat Singh’s “Why I am not a Hindu.” All of these and many more helped me shape my thoughts on rejecting not only Hinduism, but also all religions.

Atheism came to me long after I rejected religion. No matter how much I read Hume or Kant, no matter how much I read Bengali atheist writers and no matter how much I watched avant-garde films, nothing could convince me the non-existence of a pantheistic god. First glimpse of atheism came to me when I read ‘A Brief History of Time.’ Next came when I became a biologist and learned evolution. I was still afraid of calling myself an atheist, and found an easy comfort in agnosticism! But when I read Dawkins, Harris and Dennett, I realized that there is nothing to be afraid of my complete lack of belief in god. I finally declared myself an atheist. I confirmed my atheism after reading Christopher Hitchens. The question that cemented my atheism is when I learned to ask, if creation requires a creator, who created the creator?

A thing that still bothered me when I read books like “Brief History….,” where Hawking says, “If we find the answer to that, it would be the ultimate triumph of human reason — for then we would know the mind of God.” ---- why would he say that? Hitchens cleared that up for me. He said in a speech that Hawking or Einstein invokes God not because they want us to believe in a celestial God, but because they prove that our vocabulary is still of our infancy. He goes on saying that, they make no concession to the idea of our theist or theocratic dispensation. This was enough for me to accept that I don’t have to believe in a celestial dictator. And finally when it came to questioning how something is possible out of nothing ‘The Grand Design,’ gave me that answer too.
And that is how I became an atheist! And I am happy that I did.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #18: Toni

Boston Atheists member Toni writes:

I was brought up in an Agnostic family and this story rings very familiar to me.  My friends (mostly Mormon) told me about heaven, god, etc., and why I wasn’t going there.  When I told my parents, they were angry but my Dad said, “Your friends believe that all that stuff exists, I do not.  You can choose what you believe, but please do some research”.  Since I saw no more evidence for god as I did against god, I did not believe in a creator nor a place in the clouds, and soon, I became far too old to be proselytized.  I believe that must start very early or the human brain will have difficulty grasping the fairy tale.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #17: Jeff

Boston Atheists member Jeff writes:

I am an atheist-atheist. I was born an atheist, was raised in a secular environment, am an atheist and will continue to be an atheist until there is proof of the Sky Fairy. My father sat me and my brothers down and basically told us Jesus Christ was a fairy in a fairy tale. My upbringing was quite secular without much about religion. The older I get the more vocal about being an atheist I get. I guess I'm more of an anti-theist.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #16: Dave

Boston Atheists member Dave writes:

Why am I an Atheist?

Divine intervention.

(The real answer would take too much space...)

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #15: Jon

Boston Atheists member Jon writes:

I'm a third generation atheist. My mother and her mother were proudly atheist and proudly Jewish (ethnically and culturally). My mother made me go to Sunday school to get a Jewish education but, in response to my complaints, she sat in on a class and was horrified when the teacher answered a question about whether Abraham might have been wrong to agree to whack Isaac with something like, "no, because God said so." That was the last time I went to Sunday School.

When I went to college I learned a little about philosophical skepticism, which led to my rebellious phase in which I became agnostic. Eventually, though, I realized that I believed in the nonexistence of gods as strongly as I believed in the nose on my face, and given my heritage it's hard not to believe in that! I went back to being an atheist when I realized how silly it was to be agnostic about my schnoz.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Friday, June 22, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #14: Reginah

Boston Atheists member Reginah writes:

Ironically, I became an atheist when i was searching for a way to be closer to god.
I was born into a staunch catholic family, went to catholic schools etc. But that wasn't enough, I felt that something was missing. I didn't feel close to god. Around age thirteen, I became a born again christian which made me feel like I had found what I was looking for, for a while but so many a lot of things didn't make sense about god and religion. I was in limbo for a while...

But then i took a philosophy class and I became a full-fledged atheist. And the funny thing is, I had never felt freer or happier until the realization that there is no god.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #13: Nancy

Boston Atheists members Nancy writes:

My parents were raised in Jewish households, but they were not religious and in fact met while members of the Socialist party, working in Washington D.C.  They never mentioned religion or God to me at all. When I was 8 years old, a friend told me about God: he was a man in the sky, he made the world and everything on it.  I was astonished!  How could that be up the sky--and my parents never told me!

My mother gave me what I thought was a great answer:  "some people believe that's true, but your father and I do not."  Of course, that's all I needed to hear at that age, and I took it for granted that they were right.  I grew up just not thinking about God, in spite of having friends who believed, reading about God in literature and taking a class in college on the Bible.

When I was much younger (I am a baby boomer), I wanted to believe in God, probably because I thought it would be comforting, and maybe also because I thought I'd like to experience the mystical and spiritual (which I found instead through smoking pot all through college!).....But I was never successful in convincing myself and long ago gave up.

I do find that lots of people are shocked when I use the word "atheist"....they seem to be okay with "agnostic."  I wonder whether "agnostics" are just afraid to admit that they really, really don't believe in God.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #12: Vladimir

Boston Atheists member Vladimir writes:

I call myself an atheist, but deep down I believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster looking out for me. I just don’t have enough guts to come out of the closet yet. Hope you don’t mind a sincere Pastafarian around. Seriously, I think my lifelong interest in philosophy helped me to wake up. Books by Dawkins, Hitchens and Sam Harris helped me to shed any remaining doubts I had regarding religion. It was a difficult process to brake away from fanatical conservative church/circle of friends, because my family was also part of it. But by His Noodly Grace we are now more or less an atheist/agnostic family.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #11: Brett

Boston Atheists member Brett writes:

It's funny that we are doing this. In Christian circles this is a very common activity called giving testimony (sharing your come to Jesus moment).

That said, I was brought up in a pretty ordinary Protestant home. My family went to church regularly but they weren't evangelicals. But though my youth group I became pretty involved in evangelical Christianity to the point that I spent a year at bible college.

Before you think that the college was some nut house and that it sent me away let me tell you that the college was in England. Christians in Europe are different than here, they are more concerned with social justice and equality than promoting some doctrine and are just as likely to vote socialist as conservative. While there were plenty of nutters at the college it was my exposure to a new way of thinking about the world and how inequality is not necessarily what god wants that ultimately led to my fall from faith.

Upon my return to the US I found I was totally unable to reconcile my new beliefs to my fellow Christians who in this country are completely married to the existing social order and seem to think that inequality and ignorance are some sort of virtues. I slowly drifted away from the church and one by one rejected all doctrines in favor of scientific ideas. My fears of going to hell for my lack of faith slowly gave way to a realization that there is no heaven or hell. Then one day about 10 years ago a co-worker of mine made a comment about how there is not god. Suddenly I realized I was not alone there were other people like me! I am now an outspoken atheist and am happy to play the role of the devil in the lives of the faithful, sowing seeds of doubt whenever I can.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #10: Janet

Boston Atheists member Janet writes:

After twelve years of Catholic grammar school and four years of Catholic high school, not to mention a mother who was a converted Catholic which is just about as bad as being a born again Christian, I pretty much had enough of the religious scene.However, when I was diagnosed with the last stages of multiple myeloma and failed kidneys too boot, I started praying and reading the bible, but by then I knew nothing was going to save me. I took a leap of faith, but this time in myself, and decided I was going to treat my cancer the same way I had my businesses... that put me on the road to do whatever it took to get the job of saving my own life to me. It worked, I found a research team and they had a solution. Thus my experimental operation at the MGH which saved my life. But that still wasn’t exactly my “ahh..ha” moment to becoming an atheist. After I got back on my feet and instead of starting another business I went back to school and took courses in Geology, Anthropology, Archeology, Greek Mythology, Art History, Ancient Architecture, and Religion and Myths. By the time I got through all those courses I had taken, I was a full-fledged atheist. Only this time it wasn’t just because of my disappointment in my catholic religion and god, but more from my new-found knowledge.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #9: Annie

Boston Atheists member Annie ("grateful and proud!" [to be part of the BA community]) writes...

I became an atheist on December 26, 2004.    (Ironically, the day after Christmas).

I was brought up in a Catholic family. My mom was religious and dragged me to church every Sunday.  I did the whole first communion, confirmation thing...basically because I was told to. Dad didn't participate in any religion, and remained silent on the subject. The one time I felt brave enough to ask him how I was supposed to believe in god when I couldn't see him, he replied "you just have to have faith".  My little nine year old mind just figured I must be missing something. Later, I understood the glaring hypocrisy of dad staying home on Sunday mornings claiming that he had faith, while Mom and I went to church.

In my twenties I got tired of mass and instead chose to worship St. Mattress every Sunday morning, which suited me fine. But I still called myself (and thought of myself) as a Catholic, just to hedge my bets.

On December 26, 2004 when the Tsunami in Indonesia claimed all those innocent lives, I finally decided that there isn't a god. And if there is a god, he sucks.  Big time.

Then the 2009 Haiti Earthquake happened. And I got pissed.

My reading of Penn Jillette's "God, No!" enabled me to put an name to my beliefs and own them without the shame I'd been carrying.

I've "come out" to my friends, but not my family (yet)

This group has helped me immensely to shed the (useless, destructive and unfounded) embarrassment and shame I've felt at "betraying" my upbringing. Thank you everyone!!

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #8: Angelo

Boston Atheists member Angelo writes:

After thinking about it for some time, I came to some conclusions. I thought of all the gods throughout history. I thought of all the gods that are still around today. I thought that to believe in any one of these gods, you have to believe that all the other gods were just made up stories. I then  thought it was at least possible that the god I believed was also just a made up story. At that point it hit me, it is just made up, like all the other ones. Once I began thinking that specific thought, it was very difficult to feel how I once felt about God. That was the beginning of how I began identifying myself as atheist.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #7: Deb

Boston Atheists member Deb writes:

My story is not very interesting.  I never believed.  I was baptized, went to Episcopalian Sunday School more often than not from Kindergarten to being "confirmed" in high school.  I knew there were lots of other similar things no one really believed in or liked to do, but went along with anyways in order to stay civilized - like Santa Claus, or going to swim meets.

Religions and rituals from other countries and cultures were taught in school in terms of their value to a people to work through and stick together around big life events (marriage, death), understand their relationship to nature, establish the odd moral guideline.  Not as something I might believe myself.  I figured Christianity was the one I was born into, no one really believed all that nonsense anymore, but stuck to it for community, rituals, moral guidance.

I was horrified the day I realized, at age 19, that other people believed.  People at church, maybe even my parents and brother.  I made half-hearted attempts at learning more, investigating other beliefs off and on through young adulthood, but couldn't work up much of a compelling interest.  I worried that the misunderstanding and disbelief could be my own shortcoming.  Just like being really shy and bad at sports.

Mentioning my lack of belief among friends, colleagues and family seemed an egregious faux pas, so I pretty much never discussed it with anyone. Not that I felt like I was hiding a big secret, it just doesn't really come up in conversation.  Even with my husband, we're both atheists but never bothered to talk about it for many years.  

Don't get me wrong, I had contempt for fundamentalist/evangelical religious people from early on and this can usually be discussed in mixed company.  I've always admired philosophy, civic virtues and all that secular good stuff.  I never saw secular values as what set me apart, only my lack of belief.

I owe gaining an identity as an atheist to Kurt Vonnegut, and paying attention to the inspiring efforts of the American Humanist Association, the Freedom From Religion Foundation, People for the American Way, American Atheists and many others.  So thanks folks.  It's a relief to be able to say I'm an atheist and know all of these groups have got my back and then some.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #6: Drew

Boston Atheists member Drew writes:

I'm an atheist because as I developed my intellectual understanding of the world, I could not reconcile my religious upbringing with how the world actually worked. Once I found out Santa wasn't real, all the other stories of childhood started falling by the wayside. I didn't mind because even though Santa wasn't real, my parents still went out and got me presents on Christmas day, and I never liked some fat bearded concept more than my own parents anyway. Similarly, I didn't mind realizing God not being real, because the world still worked the way it works. Nothing changes when you stop believing in God--which was to me the ultimate denial of deity. If God's existence is synonymous with its nonexistence...why bother with God?

When I was going to Christian summer camp one year, I was talking to the other kids about the moment they Knew there was a god, their moment of revelation. I thought to myself "Alright, I'll start believing when I Know." To their great credit, the counselors told me I shouldn't seek out what I don't feel, and to wait for anything to find me. The moment never came, and eventually I realized it never would. I stuck by that camp but I never went back to Jesus.

I had it pretty easy I guess.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #5: Angie

Boston Atheists member Angie writes:

As a kid my family never discussed religion one way or the other.

I was puppy-dog in love and married at 23, my new husband decided to be ‘born again’ guy, I diligently read the bible every day to be a good little wife-y. The things I read brought me to tears, how could this be any god of mine??

The marriage broke up, I was a free woman at 26, dabbled in Wicca as a stepping stone. Then soon realized that even though a kinder and less misogynistic religion, I was still putting on an act, playing dungeons and dragons, the cleansing rituals involving incense and candles went nicely with my Ren Faire costumes however.

Coming out atheist was just a matter of not pretending anymore. A matter of growing up.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Friday, June 08, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #4: Dave

Boston Atheists member Dave ("proudly a new card carrying member of American Atheists") writes:

First I’d like to start by saying that I was brought up Catholic.  The Catholic Religion did nothing to keep me from their religion.  However as I entered my teenage years, I started to question things as many teens do.  The more I was exposed to people of different religions; the more I started to wonder if Catholicism was the “right” religion.   They all laid claim to being the only religion that would allow you into heaven.   This led me to question all religions including my own; spiraling me into being an Agnostic. Then after years passing of being an Agnostic, I took an introductory to philosophy course.

This is where everything involving religion in my life had turned around and changed forever.  I clearly recall what - what I call now – my “ah ha moment”.  I call it this because it precisely what I thought after the following.  One day after my philosophy class I was praying to god.  I was praying for god to forgive me for not believing in him.  It was in this moment something clicked in my mind like never before.  It just simply occurred to me how absurd it was to be praying to someone I didn’t believe existed.  I wanted to believe but just couldn’t.  There was nothing left to go on but faith which I ultimately found to be irrational.  That is how I became an Atheist.

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Thursday, June 07, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist #3: Will

Boston Atheists member Will writes:

When I was 6, my family briefly attended a congregationalist church. In Sunday school they taught me that Jesus was everywhere. After that, I was terrified that I would walk around a corner and run into zombie Jesus.

When we moved to the suburbs, we no longer attended church. Mom and dad never talked about religion, but I knew that mom was an atheist and dad a believer. Despite her atheism however, mom did believe in ghosts.

At 13 I was deeply depressed and on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to physical and psychological abuse. One form that the depression took was obsessive thoughts that the devil wanted me to sell my soul. I tried to put it out of my mind, but couldn't. So one day I said yes, I will sell my soul - I will sell my soul in exchange for the President of the United States calling me at exactly 2:00 the following day. Needless to say the president never called. But I learned a powerful lesson.

That knowledge could sweep away irrational fears. I began questioning my belief in god. I noticed that the only time I really thought about god was when I was in trouble or in pain. This seemed craven to me and offended my sense of integrity. One day I had the courage to say out loud that there was no god - all the while looking for a lightning bolt from on high.

By the age of 16 I was fully vested in reason as a means to learning about the world. I questioned everything and spent hours each day using logic to arrive at answers. I strove for complete objectivity in my thinking and viewed emotion as an unwelcome intrusion. However, at the same time I felt a schism in my consciousness between reason and subjectivity; between logic and meaning. I valued reason highly, but at the same time I was capable of having sublime experiences of awe and oneness that seemed supernatural in nature. I longed to heal this schism and through philosophy arrive at a unified viewpoint. At the same time, the abuse I had suffered as a child left me with emotional scars and a deep dissatisfaction with life. But I realized intuitively that the fault lay not with the Universe but with my perception of it. I felt that if I could just view existence from a slightly different angle everything would make sense and I would be happy.

I turned to reason to bring about this fundamental shift in perspective but soon realized that reason alone would suffice - something in ME had to change. It was at this time that I was exposed to Taoism and Buddhism. Having abandoned reason as a means to profound self-transformation, the idea of a knowing beyond words appealed to me; as did the idea of sudden enlightenment. I dropped out of college and joined a Tibetan Buddhist monastery. But ultimately I couldn't see how all the chanting would lead to enlightenment and I left.

Next, I explored many different religions and cults. I had contact with Eckankar, Scientology, Moonies, Urantians, and Jim Jones' ill-fated Peoples Temple trying to find something that I could believe in, but to no avail.

The next 10 years I engaged in an intense self-examination and analysis of my mind. During this time I could be described as a Deist. I had some vague notion that maybe there was some abstract thing out there that had set the Universe in motion and then went on vacation.

My years of self-analysis eventually lead me to question my concept of self and the existence of free will and this in turn lead to the enlightenment that I had been looking for all along. In questioning my concept of self I had successfully rooted out the last vestiges of supernatural thinking and arrived at a wholly naturalistic "spirituality."


*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist, #2: Geoff

Boston Atheists member Geoffp writes:

My personal why-I'm-an-atheist story is not very interesting, other than the importance of teaching your children to be skeptics and ask questions. My religious grandparents were very upset when my parent decided not to baptize us. So my parents made a deal with my grandparents, that while religion wouldn't be practiced (or disparaged) in our house, they would take us to church and send us to Sunday school - my parents thought it was a good way to meet and socialize with our community, and there is value in some of the teachings. However, my parents, both scientists, taught us to ask questions, be skeptical, look for flaws in reasoning (including our own, very important). Having been armed with the tools to resist indoctrination and propaganda, those religious classes and sessions never made sense to my brothers and me. After a few years of frustration of both us children (for not getting good answers) and our religious teachers (tired of our 'disruptions') we ended up stopping going entirely. My parents were very happy.

The only downside is that at age 10 or 11, when you're supposed to think adults are these magical superior beings, I was stunned that so many clearly believed all these stories. It gave me a sense of incredulous superiority that set me up to be a right arrogant b*stard for most of my life. I hope I've curbed it a little...

*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.

Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Why I Am An Atheist, #1: Matt

Boston Atheists member Matt writes:

My path to atheism is a completely spiritual one. I was raised Catholic and was almost kicked out of public school for getting into too many fights and generally never doing what I was told (despite this, I was a straight A student). I was first sent to a parochial school, then a Catholic High School and finally a Jesuit College. I am all too familiar with Catholic underpinnings.

In High School I began to read certain books like “Zen and the Art of Archery” and “The Art of War” primarily because I was a martial artists and these were classic books associated with the sport. Eventually I read the Tao Te Ching. When in a high school religion class I was assigned a to write a paper on an alternative religion, it was a no-brainer. I chose Buddhism (Taoism was not on the list). After studying it, I was surprised to find that Buddhists have no gods.

They revere Buddhas, living people and teachers who passed on. They are more like saints. But there are no gods. If you asked a Buddhist what they believe, they might tell you of the nine-fold path to enlightenment or other tenets of their religion. Nearly all of Buddhism centers on cultivating the self. Some might believe in karma and reincarnation. But I found these pretty easy to grasp. Karma just says if I am mean to you, you will be mean to me. In fact, you’ll probably tell others I am mean and they will act the same. I never saw it as some divine power rewarding or punishing you. Reincarnation is another one. I simply saw as another way of saying something similar to what Einstein said - matter and energy cannot be destroyed, only transformed. Buddhists do not believe your soul comes back complete with memories, but rather the essence of your being returns to the earth in a new form and most scientists would argue that at it’s fundamental level, that is true.

If you ask a Catholic what they believe, well, just read the Nicene Creed or the Apostles Creed (I still have them memorized due to rote repetition). You are required to believe many supernatural things. But in both of these, none concern themselves with how you deal with your fellow man or how you should attempt to make yourself a better person.

Before me were two paths, one in which I must believe supernatural claims and another that was concerned that I cultivate my self to become a better person. One said I was saved just by believing something regardless of the evidence before me. Another said I should work my whole life at being the best person I could. I felt the one the Buddhists were taking made more sense. Buddhists were far more moral in their beliefs because they were concerned with being good people. And they had no gods and very few supernatural beliefs. They didn’t need them to be good people.

I still believe that you do not need a god to be a good person.

A decade ago I would have fought for anyone to hold whatever religious belief they want. This was America were religious freedom is an important right. But in the last few years we have seen fanatics begin to pull far more attention from the media and from politician than they deserve. They undermine equality in the name of religion. They defeat science with dumb mental gymnastics. The ignore facts, evidence and reason and claim religious freedom demands that their beliefs be treated with equal weight. They impose these beliefs on others. In my time I have seen religion become more misogynistic, homophobic, anti children and protective of pedophiles. I found that the best way to defend yourself from such ignorance is to side with the atheists who nearly always can defeat the machinations of the religious agenda with facts and reason.

As for the belief that there is a man in the sky who punishes people he doesn’t like, I’m completely atheist. As to whether there is a greater order to the universe that we cannot comprehend because we are ants on rock floating in the massive expanse of space, well consider me agnostic on that front.


*

This post is part of a series, in which members of the Boston secular community explain how they came to the decision to identify as atheists. To read more posts in the series, click here. To submit your own story, email bostonatheists@gmail.com.